It is time for a reality check. You want to take over the family business but your parents don't think you're ready yet. They don't respect what you are doing and they constantly throw it in your face when they disagree with something on how the company should be run. This makes you feel like they just don't get it or care about what's best for the company as much as you do, and everytime this happens things just get worse.

 

Transcript

You know it's time for a reality check. I know you wanna take over the family business but your parents don't think you're ready yet. They don't respect what you're doing, and they constantly throw it in your face when they disagree with something on how the company should be run. And I know this makes you feel like they just don't get it, or care about what's best for the company as much as you do. And every time this happens, things just seem to get worse.

We know that you wanna take over the business and make your parents happy while you do it.

The good news is there are ways for you to get your parents to respect you. And here are some of them.

One, when a disagreement happens, don't argue back by pointing out how wrong they are. That's never gonna get you anywhere. Rather than arguing about every little thing pick one or two things, and let it go for the day. You can always revisit issues later.

Is not about right, or who's right, or who's wrong, it's about what's the best way to move the business forward. And the unfortunate thing, or the fortunate thing, depending on your point of view, there are several ways of going about doing that.

Now, the problem is you and your parents, are almost always on a different planet. Different generations see business challenges and opportunities differently, in different needs do exist. Your parents have one set of needs, you have another set needs. You need to learn what your parents said the needs are and respect those.

You have to stop fighting back. Fighting back really just makes things worse. When your parents say something like, you're not as smart as I am, or you have two options, you either tell them they're wrong, or don't respond at all. Best advice I can give you, take a breath, cool off, realize that is not really what they're talking about, and come back at it at a later time in a different way.

You know, this is a sort of problem that many rising generations face when taking over the family business. It's just something you have to deal with, and unfortunately, it's not going to go away anytime soon. The best thing you can do at this point is try your hardest to find agreement, between yourself, and your parents.

What we suggest first showing is doing, what we first suggest doing, is showing appreciation for the hard work that your parents had put in before you arrived. You see, starting a business is a lot harder than taking over a business. And your parents had to fight and scratch to get the business started. Not something you have to do, and because of that their worldview about the business is going to be different than your worldview.

So what you can do next is find out what they would like to see from the business, and then meet them somewhere between where you are, and where they are, and you're both gonna be slightly unhappy, but that seems to be the way the world works.

For example, if your parents want more profit, but he's been resisting change that needs to do this to make the company grow exponentially, work with them on a way where you both get to where you wanna go.

Now, I know that when I first started a business my father and I had this huge fight about whether growth was more important than profit was more important. My father said profit, I say growth. He was right, and I was wrong.

So it's really important for you to think about the fact that there's a good chance, your parents just might be right about what they're talking about, and you may be wrong. So trying again the same page makes you feel nervous as if your life might be on the line. But in the end it's worth the effort to get your parents on board, with what you're doing. This will make them feel that they have a stake in what's going on in the business, and that their opinion is legitimate.

Just like any partnership, compromise from both sides is crucial of success for all parties involved, is going to be possible, or even reasonable. I know it's hard to swallow your pride and let your parents know that you respect what they've done. You know, it might seem that well why do I have to show appreciation for my parents? You just do, your parents are not gonna let go, unless they feel like what they've done is being validated and you appreciate it.

You're gonna get so much more out of your relationship if you give this a try it. It's okay to feel scared or nervous about what could happen, if your parents will never support the changes that are happening in the company. This is a huge deal, and it can be difficult for anyone. Not just kids who've been brought up in the business.

I've been there, I've done it, I've experienced it, I went through those exact issues with my own father. I first tried to get my father on board with the changes I wanted to make my family stated that these were necessary and made perfect sense for what needs to happen in order for us as a company to grow. He didn't budge until he realized that this was about something that I really cared about, and I really respected his opinion along the way.

So here's what I learned and what you should do to get your parents to love what you're doing.

  1. Number one, talk less and listen more. Give them a voice in the company, empower their opinions instead of shutting down because anything they say, is not how you do things.

  2. Next, get ready to move when the window of transfer opens. Your parents won't wanna let go, but if they see that what you're doing is working, they'll be ready to move on, when they have a confidence in what you're doing and they have the trust in what you're doing. You need to get both.

  3. Third, have a conversation with us. We can help you make the transition to ownership without any major hiccups along the line. Well, of course, there's gonna be hiccups. There'll be minor hiccups. But we can help you avoid the major potholes that will get in your way.

So, set a time to talk with me, is a free 20 minute conversation. Email me at jpatrick@stagetwoplanning.com, and we'll find a time to have a conversation.

In the meantime, if you're not ready to talk download our free ebook on the Creating a Sale Ready Company. You might find there are areas you and your parents need to focus on, before you even think about transferring the business.

And while you're at it, scroll down, and let me know what you think about getting your parents to transfer the business to you.

Hey, this is Josh Patrick, you're at the Sustainable Business, thanks a lot for stopping by. I hope to see you back here really soon.

Topics: making sale ready business, Sustainable Business, family business, taking a leadership role in the family business, the sale ready company, taking over a business

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